Lech L'cha -- Unwritten

Reading the opening sentence of this parshah give me the same feeling as the song "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield. I will just let her speak for me this week. Abraham's courage is a constant source of inspiration to me, to find new ways to challenge myself and seek growth.

I am unwritten
Can't read my mind
I'm undefined

I'm just beginning
The pen's in my hand
Ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words
That you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin

No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips

Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten.

Noah--A Hollywood Hit?

The parsha of Noah, for many of us, was our first introduction to the Torah. A whimsical story about an old man who obeys G-D and builds an ark to save himself, his family and two of every animal from a great flood. Cartoon illustrations of cute animals on a big boat, doves with olive branches in their beaks and arching rainbows lured us in and held our attention while we were taught simple biblical lessons.

Only as a young adult studying the Torah did I realize the parsha of Noah had all the dramatic elements necessary to make a successful Hollywood blockbuster: There’s a vengeful antagonist, a reluctant hero, action, drama, nudity, alcoholism and finally, a resolution of conflict.

But looking deeper, there is a symbolic meaning in the parsha of Noah that speaks to me. As noted in Etz Hayim: Torah and Commentary, after reading Noah “the Hebrew word translated as ‘ark’ (tevah) appears in the Torah again only in connection with the rescue of baby Moses (Exod. 2:3-5). It refers to a boxlike vessel made to float on water. It has no rudder, sail, navigational device or crew.”

Say what!?! Is this the type of primitive Ark Noah built to ensure the survival of his family (and in turn all of humanity) in addition to the entire animal kingdom? A vessel with absolutely ZERO navigational capability? No way to control the direction you’re going or the speed you travel? Talk about having complete faith in G-D!

Perhaps there’s a valuable lesson to be learned from Noah. Maybe we should trust more in G-D and her/his infinite wisdom and plan for us. Not just during a natural catastrophe, but during the more mundane aspects of our lives. Do we really need to micro-manage every minute of our day? Maybe we should take a step back from our overly-scheduled, overly-planned lives and take brief moments to reflect on the teachings of the Torah and how they can enrich our lives. In other words, hand the reins over to G-D every now and then. It worked for Noah. And who knows….at the very least, maybe your life will turn out to make a great Hollywood script!

Noah--Family Tree

This parshah reminds me of when my husband and I were first married. We were making the long drive from Florida to Ohio so that I could meet his family. A few people came to our wedding. Everyone else stayed in Ohio, patiently waiting for us to come visit so they could throw a party for us when we got there.

I have 2 uncles, 4 aunts, and 10 cousins. Ten. Four of them hadn't existed to me since I was 5. That is when my grandmother died and my mother pretty much lost contact with her brothers and, subsequently, I never saw or spoke to their sons. Then there is the North Carolina crowd. They are the three cousins on my dad's side. I saw them about once a year. One of them for about an hour, one for maybe 3, and the other was a good friend of my sisters during that visit, so I got in a few days with him every time. My 3 remaining cousins are my mother's twin sister's kids. They are like sisters to me. We were together pretty much all the time. By necessity sometimes, but I like to think we actually liked each other growing up. I know we do now.

My husband has something like 20 aunts and uncles. They each have multiple children; some from multiple marriages. By the time I entered the picture some of his cousins had kids, and I'm pretty sure that at least one of their kids had kids. Clearly, I had a few things to learn on the trip to meet my new husband's family.

The drive from my hometown in Florida to his in Ohio is 16 hours. Brian didn't waste a second of it. He really tried to beat his family tree into my head. He tried so very, very hard. We have been married for 13 years now and I'm still not entirely certain how many aunts and uncles he has, much less his various degrees of cousin. On top of which, I rarely know who is the child of which aunt, uncle, or cousin. Keep in mind that all these people maintain some version of contact with one-another. It boggles the mind that with the sheer numbers involved they have managed to avoid ever dating a relative, accidentally or otherwise. That is to say that the magnitude of his family has not kept them from knowing who each-other are. It fascinates me on so many levels. But I digress.

All of that to say this: I feel nothing when reading the story of Noah, and I get nothing out of it except a few memories centered on the year I spent in Rainbow Girls--a club that required me to dress in formal gowns and go to meetings... boring, boring meetings. Sometimes there were dances, but the boys weren't as cool as my rocker boyfriend, and he wasn't allowed to come. Every night, though--as all good Rainbow Girls did (and probably still do)--I would open my bible to Noah before I went to bed. I feel absolutely nothing when I read this parshah. Nothing other than the vague memory of boredom.. until I get to the begots. At that point I feel muddled, stupid, and sort of miserable. Begots confuse the hell out of me. I just can't follow. Even when I see begots live and in motion, I just don't get it. I can watch begots happen (in a manner of speaking), have reunions with begots, know and sometimes love begots over the course of a 13 year marriage, but I just can't comprehend them if they number more than a handful. I need a chart of some sort so I can work it out. Luckily, I love me some chart-making. You're welcome.

hold ctrl and press + a few times if you can't read it. :)

On a side note: Nehor appears to have married his niece. I'm assuming he did this over his brother's dead body.

Noah -- The First Diagnosed PTSD Case

I have trouble getting much out of this parshah. It is hard to get past images of children doing jigsaw puzzles picturing an ark of animals. The story is so clearly a myth at every turn.

Two things do come to mind. One, the most interesting question to me is : Why does every human civilization seem to have a Flood Story? We seem to have some strong masochistic streak that makes us think we are deserving of punishment for our wicked ways. The story posits a cruel God that seems more like a immature, enraged parent than a wise deity.

Two, the most interesting moment in the parshah is the most human. It's the moment when Noah is finally safe and sound, and the first thing he does is plant a vineyard and get toasted. It's the first time for me that the parshah really comes to life. Here we have a flesh-and-blood human being. He has been through a life-changing trauma, and he just can't deal with it right away. Classic post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) situation.

Maybe there's another interpretation here. Just throwing it out there. Maybe this language is really a hint that Noah was an alcoholic for many years. Maybe he actually got drunk one night, and dreamt the whole Flood Story. Then he woke up and ranted and raved about it, and got so embarrassed about his behavior that he just kept on drinking. Maybe the whole Flood Story was just an alcoholic hallucination.

If it's all just a dream, then I don't have to wonder why God is such a petty tyrant!

Breishet- Rejection

When reading this parshah there was one thing that really stuck out to me. When Abel, son of Adam and Eve, offered his choicest of the firstlings of his flock, God accepted his gift and paid heed. However when Cain, son of Adam and Eve, came with the fruit of his soil, God did not accept and paid no heed.

There could be many reasons for this. God may have simply not liked Cain, or might not have been a big fan of fruit, but it is my belief that God set out to test Cain. God merely wanted to see if man was strong enough to deal with rejection from God. Unfortunately Cain wasn‘t. He went out and killed Abel. When God asked about this he replied “Am I my brother’s keeper?” Thus being our first example of back-talk.

When God did not accept his gift, he was not just testing Cain, but the entire world. God wouldn’t just pick Cain for no reason, God thought Cain was the strongest person there, in that four people population world. If God had just picked anybody, the outcome could have been much worse. God wanted to see what man would do, but being unable to pick everyone, God founded the strongest and tested him. If he couldn’t do it no one could.

I think just this little bit of the parshah has a lot to say. It shows how hard rejection from God can be on a person. Someone that you have built your beliefs off of, your life off of for some, the mere foundation of your soul, is now refusing the little kindness you can give to them. Roll this one around awhile, if you were to give something to God and He did not accept, what would you do?

I hope you wouldn’t go off to kill the next person God accepts a gift from. I don’t know what I would do, though. It seems like something so far away. I have never tried to give a gift to God. I like to think it is a gift when I come to synagogue to pray with the entire community, that that is a gift. When the only thing anybody in that room is in there to pray to God.
Of course though, during those times, literally the only people on earth were Adam, Eve, Cain, and Abel. They didn’t even make a minion. So the only way to give a gift to God was through what the grew with their hands, and took care of through their love.

I think the only thing we could do if ever to feel rejected by God, is to remember this:

“Why are you distressed,
And why is your face fallen?
Surely if you do right,
There is uplift.
But if you do not do right
Sin crouches at the door;
It urge is toward you,
But you can be its master.”

Remember that you can be its master. When all is against you don’t go into the easy temptation of evil. In the end it won’t pay off. When Cain had done evil it was only him who took fall. Forced to run from what he once built his life upon.

B'reishit — He-She: The first human

Whenever I read this Parshah, I am drawn again, and again to the first humans on earth: Adam and Eve.

In my Stone edition of the Torah, it reads: 1:26 "And G-d said, 'Let us make Man in Our image, after Our likeness. They shall rule over the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, and over the animal, the whole earth, and every creeping thing that creeps upon the earth."

1:27 "So G-d created Man in His image, in the image of G-d He created him: male and female He created them."

This is the classic interpretation, the Orthodox interpretation.

My URJ (Union for Reform Judaism) Torah says it differently: 1:26 "G-d now said, "Let us make human beings in our image, after our likeness; and let them hold sway over the fish of the sea and the birds in the sky, over the beasts, over all the earth, over all that creeps upon the earth."

1:27 "So G-d created the human beings in [the divine] image, creating [them] in the image of G-d, creating them male and female."

See the difference? In the classic Torah it states that G-d created "him: male and female He created them." This first "human" was, both male and female in one body. This he-she being wasn't separated until G-d placed them in the Garden of Eden.

And then G-d saw that maybe this wasn't the ideal way for human-kind to begin. He split this he-she into two distinct people, one male and one female. G-d saw that one human could not procreate, could not have a partner to share life with. Indeed, G-d saw that "Man" would be lonely without someone to share life with.

I like that. I like that G-d saw that human-kind needed companionship, that we were never meant to live life alone, without anyone to talk to or share our life with.

In my Women's Commentary Torah (URJ), it is written this way:

1:26 "G-d now said, "Let us make human beings in our image, after our likeness..." 1:27 "So G-d created the human beings in [the divine] image, creating [them] in the image of G-d, creating them male and female."

While this may be more appropriate "modern" language, to me it takes away this first he-she — this first human who had all of Mankinds abilities and shortcomings in one form. That for a brief time, both male and female existed together, sharing a body and a mind and a soul.

That may be why I like the term for one's soulmate: B'sheirt (which seems so close to B'reishit, naturally).

While I am a liberal feminist Jewish woman who believes that men and women should have equal rights and equal pay and be equal partners... I also like being a woman, being able to become a wife, being able to become pregnant, (if and when I choose to, thank you very much).

I met my husband when I was 19. The day I met him, in the middle of a rainstorm in Chillicothe, Ohio, I felt immediately as though I already knew him. I was drawn to my husband — I just had a strong feeling that I already knew him. And today, after being together since that day (May 19, 1985), I can truly say that I did find my b'sheirt. My soulmate. That after many good times and bad, in sickness and in health, as a couple and as parents, we have been true to each other, have respected each other and learned from each other — and that we continue to do so. I joke to our son that Daddy didn't cook his "famous egg, bacon and cheese sandwich" until we had been married 10 years. And, if you had told me in 1989, when we got married, that my husband would convert 22 years later, I would have laughed out loud.

I like being a woman. I love being a mother. I have grown in my faith over the years, especially since becoming a mother.

I like that the original Torah has G-d creating a humanoid that is both male and female at once. Sometimes it is good to remember that at one time, all of humankind was created in the image of G-d. That we were once One Being — and that if we can remember to respect each other, then we are living the way G-d intended: to be each others helper and companion. Not necessarily to be "better" or to "obey" each other, rather to inspire and lift each other up to be the best version of ourselves.

Bereishit--Spider/man?

I almost did not come back to Judaism over this language. Just when I was exploring a return to my Jewish-ness in the late 1990's, I was also waking up to what we've done to this planet.

The language I'm talking about is at Genesis 1:28: "... and God said to them, 'Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and tame it; hold sway over the fish of the sea and the birds of the sky, and over every animal that creeps on the earth.'"

The Hebrew word that becomes "hold sway" in the latest URJ (Union for Reform Judaism) translation is usually translated as "dominion." "Dominion" is defined (Miriam-Webster) as "supreme authority" or "absolute ownership."

This language, one could argue, is the root cause of our wonderful (read: terrible and horrific) trampling of this earth.

I was angry at the Torah for many years over this language. Then I decided that, if the Torah was written by men, this language was put in by those men for the same reason that American courts have ruled that corporations are people -- as a basis for pillaging, plundering and otherwise doing whatever it takes to make the maximum profit. So I decided to be angry at stupid ancient people, not at the Torah.

For the same reason, I am also angry at stupid modern people. They seem to have forgotten or never grasped the basic concept that we are part of this earth. "Nature" is not something apart from us. We are part and parcel of "nature."

I have not seen Spiderman, the movie, but I've heard that it tells us that "with great power comes great responsibility." It's very appropriate that a "spider"-man reminds us that dominion should not be a license for destruction.

Bereishit--The Gift of Sight

Bereishit really covers a lot of ground. Truthfully, though, I knew what I would write about well before I picked up my Tanakh. My kids wanted to do a weekly Bible study at this time last year, and we read this parsha and discussed it. My son (10-years-old at the time) pointed something out after we read that sparked a long conversation that I’ve pondered several times since.

Genesis 3:6 “When the woman saw that the tree was good for eating and a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable as a source for wisdom, she took of its fruit and ate.” The key words and phrases in this passage are “the woman saw,” “delight to the eyes,” and “the tree was desirable.” This passage as I see it is showing us the danger that our own senses, sight in particular, can pose when pitted against our better judgment. Leading into this verse, the serpent is trying to convince Eve to eat from the tree. He tries subterfuge and twisting what God told her, and I’m certain that to some degree these things affected her, but what really did her in was her own eyes.

How often are we sold flash with no substance? Cars, for example, are more and more about apparent bells and whistles while being cheaply manufactured—made to sell, not to last. People often find themselves caught up in relationships in which they aren’t treated well, or have little in common with their partner, because they find the person physically attractive. Merely driving by a Dunkin Donuts sign can send me down a road and an eventual shame spiral that I easily avoid if I take Sheridan instead of University.

I read a quote once that read something like “Unquestioning obedience is a strange gift to give the creator of the human mind.” It’s one of my favorites, although I have no clue who said it, where I found it, or if I’m quoting it correctly. Nevertheless, it strikes at the heart of my beliefs, and I like to toss it around when in the company of certain people. What Genesis 3:6 brings to mind is how easily we give our unquestioning obedience to our eyes when our mind or our gut is telling us to go another way. We trust people who shouldn’t be trusted. We make decisions about the food we eat based on packaging and presentation. We allow pictures and videos to determine our expectations in our most intimate moments. We choose the younger, better-looking Presidential candidate with the newscaster hair.

The question is: how are we supposed to do what Eve could not? She was completely unaffected by the pitfalls of modern marketing. She had a simple existence—everything provided for her, the ideal companion, God walking in her midst. Yet all it took for her to choose that thing she knew was wrong, and to ultimately throw everything she had away, was to see that the fruit was a delight to the eyes and was desirable.

I’m not saying I know what to do about this. For now, I am just trying to stick to using Sheridan when I have that option. The only thing I can say with certainty is that we should always be striving to go beyond seeing and into understanding.